Smack the Slack

Okay, I'll take one. Even two. I know I deserve it. Geez, I can never get on top of things. That's the one goal I have every single waking moment... "get on top of things". And it's the one thing I can never achieve. I'm as hopeless as this blog.

I had the flu this week (uy, hoping to gain some sympathy). Went to see my doctor , this time with the mission of staying in his clinic for more than 5 minutes, making the most of my $50 fee. So I went from describing to him what I thought might be symptoms of brain tumor (for dramatic effect) to discussing my iron deficiency which led me to the laboratory for another blood test (that wasn't part of my plan), to discussing my blood disorder, thalasaemia (the spelling of which I still haven't mustered), to getting tips on figuring out my ovulation period (I was running out of things to talk about here, you see), to sneakily enquiring why Edwin requires a second blood test that will last for 2 hours but due to doctor-patient confidentiality, I didn't get any answer (doctor knew I was pushing it).

As it turns out, I did have the flu. Two days of missing work would have been an ideal way of finally "getting on top of things" at home. But when you have the fever and you can't eat anything, holding a pen to write down your list of things to do already poses a huge hurdle. So I still haven't done the paper work for claiming our medical expenses. The one thing I have been meaning to do in the last 11 months!

My blood test results reveal that my blood count is fine and while my iron deficiency improved ever so slightly from level 4 to 6, doctor remains unsatisfied with this progress and is now coming up with a brilliant idea to ameliorate this situation. Watch this space. And now that I have recovered, craving for salmon steak, and typing this new entry, I am itching all over my legs and arms, possible allergy from Jack n Jill Chippy! Could I be more unfortunate? Yes, this is one of those days when I crave for products from our homeland. Had one sampaloc and shared Chippy with Cerise. And now it seems I'll have to suffer the consequences of finally eating after a day and a half of starvation.

Next week I return to work with plenty of things to accomplish. I haven't been particularly happy with work lately. It's just wonderful how management showed concern about my unhappiness. Had serious talks with my boss who explicitly admitted management was worried I was unhappy and they didn't want that so they wanted to know how to make me happy rather than see me bid the company goodbye. Now that's comforting and can be flattering but also a play of reverse psychology, don't you think? Coz now, I feel more obliged. Instead of demanding for things that will make me happy, I find myself feeling guilty at how management looks after me so I focus more on what I should and can do for them and not the other way around. I suppose it's the right thing to do because in all honesty, I haven't been self-motivated lately to perform my best. They know and I know I can do better, I can do more. But for some reason, I don't. I'll stop rambling on this coz I really don't know what's going on here.

Guess I deserve 3 smacks after all.